I seriously hate myself for being sick twice in just a week.

I'm supposed to be at T.H.E. Seniors MAF and Training Workshop now, but here I am blogging about how much I hate myself. I feel so bad for not being able to be there, especially there will be so many things to deal with today since it is a special event celebration. There's so much I wish I can do today, but I totally hate myself for being sick at the wrong time.

I'm not that sick enough to lie in bed the whole day, having no energy to do anything at all. But I chose not to go because I must think of the welfare of the elderly. I don't want to pass my sickness to them. But yet, I can't do anything for the comm when I know we're all going to need a lot of help and support from one another since this is the 1st special event planned by the new comm.

I think I'm such a lousy vice. Forgetting to collect the canned food. Letting others collect mooncakes on my behalf. Unable to give clear answers to the new comm even though I've been in T.H.E. Seniors for a year. Is that the best I can do? Being sick is not an excuse for shirking responsibilities. I'm sure I can definitely do better than this.

I hate myself right now, this moment.