?_?

so sad... damn sad... T.T coz ITP placement result is out.. not even 1 bit close to wad I expect.. feel so cheated... dun see any benefits at all... cheap labour, far from home, long distance from mrt, start work early.. wad else?? my only consolation is it's an international company.. I've no clue wad e company does exactly.. what's a vacation exchange programme anw??

my dream is to help design & maintain JJFC website one day.. den I'll make alot of nice nice banner and flash for JJFC.. =) but now, I'm juz an anonymous member who haben got her membership card & t-shirt yet.. =(

after being cheated tis afternoon, since I'm in raffles, so meet shian for dinner.. went swensens coz we really dunno where to go..

show shian e piapia adidas shoes tt I wan! I like it alot! =) getting it soon or near new year ba... $109.. thanks samsung in advance for giving me new shoes! *muawkz!!!* XD so I'll have a piapia blog, piapia bag, piapia hp strap, piapia wallet, piapia esprit shirt.. and a piapia new shoes! I dun mind if shian wan buy me piapia undies too! =P

人。。。总有那么一回吧？

累了一整天，终于可以休息了。 听着mp3里播出的 “残废”，闭上了双眼。才没多久，在听着歌当儿，好像隐隐约约听见了雨声敲打着车窗。。 滴答滴答。。。 睁开眼睛看， 外面真的下起雨了喔！ 继续闭上眼睛，脑海里一直想着听着的歌和雨天。。。 有点凄凉的感觉。。。

“最怕你突然要挽回。。。回到了原点。。。 原点却又像终点。。。然后多痛一遍。。。”

到站了。 雨也停了。 哇！ 才不过十分钟的时间罢了。。 好快喔。。 天空不作美， 天气也如此地变化无常。。 嗨。。。 真是感慨。。。

人也是如此罢。。。 是我变了？ 还是周围的事物变了？ 我真的好像知道。。。 有些时候， 会觉得有些事忽然好像离我好远了， 而有些也是我不再关心了。。 是这样吗？ 最近更是如此。。 是不是应该注意什么了呢？是否再回到原点， 找回最初的自己？

放弃？脱离？ 这一切都应该有属于自己的答案吧？

内心世界

很多时候, 我真的不了解... 不了解的事情很多很多... 是我吗? 还是因为其他因素?

为什么一切就不能如此简单呢? 为何就是那么地复杂? 是我单纯? 还是天真?

在我心中隐藏了一个秘密.. 当大家以为都过去了, 我也没有否认.. 只是因为我知道, 有些事情真的是不会发生的.. 事实往往并非我所想的.. 我能得到的, 并不是我想要的.. 我想要的呢, 却可能永远都得不到.. 其实, 我也没有奢望什么, 只是希望能拥有那一点点, 我也会满足了..

我可能看起来很糊涂, 所以大家都以为有很多事情我都不知道.. 其实我知道的, 有很多很多.. 不说,不代表不知道. 只是不想说而已.. 而不想说... 是因为知道太多...

不相信永远, 因为永远真的很遥远..

Why??

come to think of it.. am I supposed to say it's ironic?? or am I supposed to say I dun have e face?? I dun feel good keeping it a secret.. wad's wrong wif all tis? to wad it's reduced to now.. it's supposed to be sth happy.. but y dun I feel so? and yet, I've to do it secretly? is thr so much to hide from others? or izit I cant take anymore from others??

I know I've been throwing temper now and then tis few days.. I know I shldn't.. and worst, mayb at e wrong person.. but can I help it? I juz feel so suppressed from e treatment I've been receiving.. am I wrong? am I wrong for being who I am? am I even more wrong for sth tt I cant control??

I dun talk dun mean I've nth to say.. I dun talk is coz I have no wish to say it out.. look ard me.. get wad I mean?

after looking upon so much, I've understood wad has caused me to fail. 1 word..

_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

suay!

finally done wif ecm! for now only.. still got some parts need to ask cher la.. so sianz rite.. took off today to do assignments at home.. how sad huh..

somemore so suay y'day saw my sales rep @ expo thr, when supposedly she tot I doing assignment somewhere since I told her I not working coz of tt.. dunno she got see me not, coz I dragged jacq away, den jacq say my sales rep was looking @ her tt time. so u know how close rite, jq & ck was standing near my sales rep? juz e opp of a wagon k! and where got so suay rite! I dun go she nv go, I go den she go at e time I go! haiz.. pray pray.. she nv see me.. dun wan disappoint her coz my mama say she din manage to get a promoter to replace me today.. make me feel so bad le lo... coz nearing x'mas le ma, sales will b better & I'm taking off when she needs me at tis point of time.. T.T

*wo bu shi gu yi de!!!*

need a break soon! to study and have fun.. overwhelming wif assignments, yet like so slack.. time to reflect.. dun wanna see bad grades on my result slip tis sem sia! dun wanna disappoint so many ppl la.. but y am I still slacking like siao??!! argh!!! time to buck up le.. or my wish of getting diploma wif merit will fly away.. T.T

5300

I wanna buy new phone! haha! I've set my eyes on nokia 5300!

nono.. it's not coz it's e phone advertised on kenji's mv..

it's a lil bad to abandon my present hp isn't it?? coz it's not even a yr old!!! but u know how irritating is my ok button rite? how sad u cant use my hp as a calculater, juz coz e only = button is e ok button..

hmm... wait til I've earned enuff next yr.. haha... I tink I'll definitely change my hp next yr.. for now, it's 5300 tt I wan.. mayb I'm weird, coz alot ppl would pick song ericsson. but I stil like 5300 design.. I mean e red/white one anw.. or mayb there'll b another by next yr tt I like??

dunno!

aiya... someone get me 5300 for x'mas! haha... den I wun have to wait & tink so much..

kbox @ clementi

got back wssd test today.. unexpected to have done so well.. but it's coz e paper was mark veri leniently la.. so I tink everyone did quite well too... so end up wad I predicted was totally e opp! coz I tot I'll do badly in wssd & e best in sdt.. anw, I score e lousiest in rwps out of e 4 msts tis sem.. and I know I shld not say lousy here, coz everyone in e class know my rwps results la.. lol... and and and! I score e best in wssd! LOL!

went to kbox @ clementi wif jiahui after sch.. wad a bad experience! lousy service! spoiled our so high mood down thr la! so next time anyone wan go kbox, pls avoid clementi.. I wanna complain!!!

Complaints:
1. Nobody around can be seen to serve u even from far.
2. Press "0" for service on e phone, but no one picks up.
3. Ash tray delivered 1 hour later. (it's not a matter coz i dun smoke. but wad if I smoke?)
4. Told us we're NOT SUPPOSED to order this drink not included in student package, AFTER we drank almost empty. ( like it's my fault u nv said tt earlier??)
5. Bill took a long time. nvm.. when we tot it's long, came back to confirm we gave him $30 for e $25+ bill. ( I tot if I gave u $20, obvious u'll say it's not enuff in a paiseh manner?)
6. Bill took almost half hr in all.

Well, when e girl came in wif a stack of bills, e guy juz pop his head over e stack of bills & askus to sing our last song. and I gladly told e girl, we sang finish le, JUST waiting for e bill to b returned. wasted my $2+ on service charge. not i wan kei gao la.. but dey dun deserve it!

anw, on a happier note.. I sang my "ming tian guo hou" finally! haha... and of coz we sang lots & lots of JJ songs.. haha.. we sang mostly w/o vocals la.. and it's really bad sounding coz we nv really "kai sang" til veri later of e session. haha... den can hear me sing alot out of tune.. haha.. damn funny la.. we stood up to sing ok! den ppl walk pass we damn paiseh la! anw, both of us were obsessed wif "zui jin" & "Love Story" tt we k both songs 3x!! haha...

okie! time to start planning for e next kbox trip! lol!!! but den but den! I'll rmb to go lot1 or somewhere else in e future! haha..