is tt all I wan? am I satisfied wif wad I have now? ppl keep telling me things shld change.. but wad's e risk? can I afford to make things change? nobody can foresee wad's in front of me. nether can I. they tell me not to wait for things to happen themselves, but make them happen instead. I know it's wad I shld do. but how?
perhaps I'm juz a coward. I'm too scared to see e results. they keep telling me, changes can make me happy. but it's not 100% u know. wad if things dun change e way I wanted? wad if I hurt myself in e process of changing things? wad if things aren't any better than b4? wad if? wad if...
so come to think now, there's so much to consider, too much tt I dun think I wan to change my life. realli, I'm satisfied to be juz waiting, like always.
Monday, July 31, 2006
Thursday, July 27, 2006
Tired out.....
I'm sorry for not keeping my promise.. but dey understand y... it's juz so hard to keep it going, after taking it for so long..
dey understand I cry for a reason. but at least dey know I cry for a different reason. dey tell me things shld change. but how? it's become a norm, we all know tt. it's juz so hard to change it now. e person who make me cry has nv known tt she has hurt me so deeply, leaving a scar in my heart. I've bring it so far.. too far... tt I cannot reach out anymore... when I finally break down, she didn't know tt, only dey who feel e pain for me understand I cry for a reason...
heal it & seal it... if ever one day I seal it, it'll b e day we all know we shall drift apart... real far...
dey understand I cry for a reason. but at least dey know I cry for a different reason. dey tell me things shld change. but how? it's become a norm, we all know tt. it's juz so hard to change it now. e person who make me cry has nv known tt she has hurt me so deeply, leaving a scar in my heart. I've bring it so far.. too far... tt I cannot reach out anymore... when I finally break down, she didn't know tt, only dey who feel e pain for me understand I cry for a reason...
heal it & seal it... if ever one day I seal it, it'll b e day we all know we shall drift apart... real far...
Monday, July 24, 2006
18 le! 1st month JJFC member
double celebration! hehe... it's my birthday! and I'm officially JJFC member for 1 month! lol... 18 le wor... hmm... of legal age.. wa... sounds so old suddenly.. haha... as for e feeling of being JJFC member a month, besides haven gotten my tee, all r great! made many friends & having lots of fun! haha...
went out wif leng to orchard y'day.. so long nv go out together le.. miss her alot! yeah, she's e 1st one to celebrate my b'day. =P feel so bad last yr ALMOST forgot her b'day.. haha... coz during exam period ma.. cannot blame hor... anw, leng say wilbur pan look like woodstock o.O izit??
as for today, met wei early in e morning b4 sch. den go sch. e usual class clique bought me a big birthday cookie, a necklace, a magnet woodstock & a box of sweets. thanks guys! was rushing SAPD so during lunch no time celebrate, so wait til after INSE tutorial den celebrate in e class. haha.. after sch actu went woodlands library looking for INSE resources! fancy going to library on my b'day! how great! aiya.. pls admit I'm guai. haha...
really thankful to who celebrated for me, given me their wishes, even those who sent me an sms to wish me! hee... I really wanna say a big thank you to all! I've got my wishes of disney piglet, woodstock in e form of stickers & magnet. though it's stil not complete.. I'm very happy le! =P
as for e not complete part, I'm not actu complaining. coz I understand it's not easy to get.. it's not anyone who can fulfil tis wish of mine. I know for sure, if it meant to be, it'll be. hehe...
went out wif leng to orchard y'day.. so long nv go out together le.. miss her alot! yeah, she's e 1st one to celebrate my b'day. =P feel so bad last yr ALMOST forgot her b'day.. haha... coz during exam period ma.. cannot blame hor... anw, leng say wilbur pan look like woodstock o.O izit??
as for today, met wei early in e morning b4 sch. den go sch. e usual class clique bought me a big birthday cookie, a necklace, a magnet woodstock & a box of sweets. thanks guys! was rushing SAPD so during lunch no time celebrate, so wait til after INSE tutorial den celebrate in e class. haha.. after sch actu went woodlands library looking for INSE resources! fancy going to library on my b'day! how great! aiya.. pls admit I'm guai. haha...
really thankful to who celebrated for me, given me their wishes, even those who sent me an sms to wish me! hee... I really wanna say a big thank you to all! I've got my wishes of disney piglet, woodstock in e form of stickers & magnet. though it's stil not complete.. I'm very happy le! =P
as for e not complete part, I'm not actu complaining. coz I understand it's not easy to get.. it's not anyone who can fulfil tis wish of mine. I know for sure, if it meant to be, it'll be. hehe...
Friday, July 21, 2006
Random Stuff(From Jiahui's blog)
| You are 67% Leo |
 |
How Leo Are You?
| Your Birthdate: July 24 |
 Your strength: Your devotion Your weakness: Reliance on others for happiness Your power color: Lilac Your power symbol: Heart Your power month: June |
What Does Your Birth Date Mean?
| Your Dominant Intelligence is Musical Intelligence |
 You would make a great musician, disc jockey, singer, or composer. |
What Kind of Intelligence Do You Have?
| You Are 50% Left Brained, 50% Right Brained |
The left side of your brain controls verbal ability, attention to detail, and reasoning. Left brained people are good at communication and persuading others. If you're left brained, you are likely good at math and logic. Your left brain prefers dogs, reading, and quiet. The right side of your brain is all about creativity and flexibility. Daring and intuitive, right brained people see the world in their unique way. If you're right brained, you likely have a talent for creative writing and art. Your right brain prefers day dreaming, philosophy, and sports. |
Are You Right or Left Brained?
| You Should Learn Japanese |
 |
What Language Should You Learn?
| Your EQ is 120 |
 |
How You Are In Love |
 You tend to take more than give in relationships. You need your space and privacy. You don't like to be smothered. You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change. You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard. |
How Are You In Love?
tell me...
cherish wad u have now... how? am I doing e right thing? always been thinking I'm silly & naive. but isn't it wad I've insisted for so long rite? I've said I would wait.. but how long? it's a non-existence promise to myself. wad would u do?
Monday, July 17, 2006
Ugliest of the Ugliest
End of VDG assignment 1! yeah! Start of SCT assignment! Boo~~!
well... ugly cheenas I muz say! not tt I wanna condemn them, but their actions are utterly disgraceful! 1 is even enuff, but there's like over hundreds of them! imagine being overwhelmed by uncountable of them! argh! totally disgusted sia!
this was actually wad happen la.. was actually anticipating for y'day event @ padang coz JJ'll b there. but it's so disappointing we din even get to see JJ when we left. it's a gd thing rather, coz I think if we'd stayed, we'll be totally squashed flat. a few of us JJFC members went there early to book seats. but it dun matter at all, coz everything happen when Tanya came out to rehearse. some ppl in e front stood up to watch, so ppl behind took e chance to shift & squeeze in wherever there's gap. I'm not kidding, mostly r cheenas, telling from e accent dey spoke. it wasn't so bad in e 1st place. e situation went uncontrollable after a few singers appeared to rehearse! some ppl even fell over can! and when ppl fell over, wad do u do? help them up? NO! these cheenas juz keep taking chances to squeeze even more! if u've seen e siuation, we're really squash from our original spot to e sides, leaving no gap. really, everyone was like touching someone in front, behind, and even beside u! even worse! these cheenas dun care abt others! so fugly! dey just step over ur belongings like nobody's business can! when u shout at them telling them to stop pushing, dey juz retort u back. as if dey're right! omg can! bunch of idiots!
couldn't really care less. anw, me, jiahui, xinyi & huiting went out of the terrible messy crowd when karina felt sick. pls la! seriously, who can tahan all these squashing abt. perhaps only this ugly cheenas. dey wun even give a way for a sick person can! until xinyi shouted who wan to b responsible if someone faint den dey give a way. assholes! brought karina to raffles city rest lo. seeing or not seeing JJ is not impt anymore la, our life is more impt. like wad xinyi said, we can see JJ many times in futre, but we only have 1 life lor.
Seriously, if Singaporeans live up to the reputation of kiasu-ness, wad abt these cheenas? I think dey're worse than us can! competitive, kiasu, unreasonable! wth lor! time to time we try to change our impression abt them. but time to time, dey aso show us the ugly side of them. no wonder there's this issue abt study mums juz recently. I felt pity for them when dey lost their jobs overnite, but there's this issue over we shldn't pity them due to many factors. now perhaps I understand y. now think, if we pity them, who pity us locals den?
anw, met shian & hl for class bbq la. might as well lo.. went to ck's house wif e rest after clearing up e bbq area to do vdg til veri late b4 we went home. it's fun lehz. haha... hmm... I'm abit tanned after 5hrs in e hot sun,but it's temporary la.. lol...
well... ugly cheenas I muz say! not tt I wanna condemn them, but their actions are utterly disgraceful! 1 is even enuff, but there's like over hundreds of them! imagine being overwhelmed by uncountable of them! argh! totally disgusted sia!
this was actually wad happen la.. was actually anticipating for y'day event @ padang coz JJ'll b there. but it's so disappointing we din even get to see JJ when we left. it's a gd thing rather, coz I think if we'd stayed, we'll be totally squashed flat. a few of us JJFC members went there early to book seats. but it dun matter at all, coz everything happen when Tanya came out to rehearse. some ppl in e front stood up to watch, so ppl behind took e chance to shift & squeeze in wherever there's gap. I'm not kidding, mostly r cheenas, telling from e accent dey spoke. it wasn't so bad in e 1st place. e situation went uncontrollable after a few singers appeared to rehearse! some ppl even fell over can! and when ppl fell over, wad do u do? help them up? NO! these cheenas juz keep taking chances to squeeze even more! if u've seen e siuation, we're really squash from our original spot to e sides, leaving no gap. really, everyone was like touching someone in front, behind, and even beside u! even worse! these cheenas dun care abt others! so fugly! dey just step over ur belongings like nobody's business can! when u shout at them telling them to stop pushing, dey juz retort u back. as if dey're right! omg can! bunch of idiots!
couldn't really care less. anw, me, jiahui, xinyi & huiting went out of the terrible messy crowd when karina felt sick. pls la! seriously, who can tahan all these squashing abt. perhaps only this ugly cheenas. dey wun even give a way for a sick person can! until xinyi shouted who wan to b responsible if someone faint den dey give a way. assholes! brought karina to raffles city rest lo. seeing or not seeing JJ is not impt anymore la, our life is more impt. like wad xinyi said, we can see JJ many times in futre, but we only have 1 life lor.
Seriously, if Singaporeans live up to the reputation of kiasu-ness, wad abt these cheenas? I think dey're worse than us can! competitive, kiasu, unreasonable! wth lor! time to time we try to change our impression abt them. but time to time, dey aso show us the ugly side of them. no wonder there's this issue abt study mums juz recently. I felt pity for them when dey lost their jobs overnite, but there's this issue over we shldn't pity them due to many factors. now perhaps I understand y. now think, if we pity them, who pity us locals den?
anw, met shian & hl for class bbq la. might as well lo.. went to ck's house wif e rest after clearing up e bbq area to do vdg til veri late b4 we went home. it's fun lehz. haha... hmm... I'm abit tanned after 5hrs in e hot sun,but it's temporary la.. lol...
Saturday, July 15, 2006
random posting
haha... long time no post.. too long nv post aso dunno wad to type le. all assignments & stuff lor. nvm.. I found this post, and hey! it's 77% true abt me. haha...
----------------JULY BABY --------------
-Fun to be with. -Secretive.
-Difficult to fathom and to be understood.
-Quiet unless excited or tensed.
-Takes pride in oneself.
-Has reputation.
-Easily consoled.
-Honest.
-Concerned about people's feelings.
-Tactful.
-Friendly.
-Approachable.
-Emotional temperamental and unpredictable.
-Moody and easily hurt.
-Witty and sparkly.
-spazzy at times.
-Not revengeful.
-Forgiving but never forgets.
-dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things.
-Guides others physically and mentally.
-Sensitive and forms impressions carefully.
-Caring and loving.
-Treats others equally.
-Strong sense of sympathy.
-Wary and sharp.
-Judges people through observations.
-Hardworking.
-No difficulties in studying.
-Loves to be alone.
-Always broods about the past and the old friends.
-Waits for friends.
-Never looks for friends.
-Not aggressive unless provoked.
-Loves to be loved.
-Easily hurt but takes long to recover.
----------------JULY BABY --------------
-Fun to be with. -Secretive.
-Difficult to fathom and to be understood.
-Quiet unless excited or tensed.
-Takes pride in oneself.
-Has reputation.
-Easily consoled.
-Honest.
-Concerned about people's feelings.
-Tactful.
-Friendly.
-Approachable.
-Emotional temperamental and unpredictable.
-Moody and easily hurt.
-Witty and sparkly.
-spazzy at times.
-Not revengeful.
-Forgiving but never forgets.
-dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things.
-Guides others physically and mentally.
-Sensitive and forms impressions carefully.
-Caring and loving.
-Treats others equally.
-Strong sense of sympathy.
-Wary and sharp.
-Judges people through observations.
-Hardworking.
-No difficulties in studying.
-Loves to be alone.
-Always broods about the past and the old friends.
-Waits for friends.
-Never looks for friends.
-Not aggressive unless provoked.
-Loves to be loved.
-Easily hurt but takes long to recover.
Friday, July 07, 2006
FuN DaY wiF JiaHuI
wad a laugh!
met jiahui at JEC after sch today. coz I owe her money so meet up to return her.. we went to tt ZingDo or sth like tt de korean place to eat lunch. dey have orange table & chairs! while we waiting for our food, obviously we talk abt JJ again la! we were talking abt superband den jiahui say sth related to MiLuBing, which I shall not say. it's not anything nice can le. Never judge a book by its cover. hmm... den our food came & e person was like teaching us how to cook it. haha... e hotplate quite nice leh, goes wif e chilli even better! haha... paiseh lor.. jiahui loves to eat alot of chilli like me. haha... bleh!
after lunch jiahui bought her i-weekly & I show her e page where JJ's concert was reported. both of us were like so digusted by e reporter who wrote e lines la. pls lor... I tink e reporter shld do some homework b4 going to ppl's concert. dun anyhow write lor. she dun understand wad e concert concept is abt so she commented so badly abt e concert as if e concert wasn't worth watching at all. but if u gonna ask us fans, we know wad exactly JJ trying to bring out to us lor. e only thing she commented well was JJ playing piano while singing. wth?! if JJ's going to do tt during e whole concert, it'll then b more boring la! somemore say Jinsha act cute! excuse me lor, Jinsha IS cute, she dun have act. and in any way I bet she's prettier than u 100x! pls la, next time for any concert, kindly send a more sensible reporter who'll do his/her homework & not give crap comments. stupid reporter.
anw, we took train to JP to shop la. our funny topic nv end de la! wif jiahui ard, it's always so hilarious.or shld I say coz it's e both of us. haha... jiahui showed me this puma shoes she wanted to buy, but she bought e other one her friend asked her to buy e other day. so now she considering whether she wan buy tt puma shoes not. haha... rich sia! dun encourage her to buy! haha... walk walk shop shop, end up only jiahui bought a pair of new socks. nth caught my interest la.. haha... we went to e pet shop & saw tis 2 puppies fighting. so cute la! haha... went home after tt.
when I reach home, I added Alex from J3 as my friendster friend. haha... and he accepted it in less than 15min la! *secret* it's sth jiahui told me abt friendster friends & its relationships. super funny la... *evil chuckle* our talk is endless la.. juz keep crapping wif jiahui whole day on msn la.. haha...
met jiahui at JEC after sch today. coz I owe her money so meet up to return her.. we went to tt ZingDo or sth like tt de korean place to eat lunch. dey have orange table & chairs! while we waiting for our food, obviously we talk abt JJ again la! we were talking abt superband den jiahui say sth related to MiLuBing, which I shall not say. it's not anything nice can le. Never judge a book by its cover. hmm... den our food came & e person was like teaching us how to cook it. haha... e hotplate quite nice leh, goes wif e chilli even better! haha... paiseh lor.. jiahui loves to eat alot of chilli like me. haha... bleh!
after lunch jiahui bought her i-weekly & I show her e page where JJ's concert was reported. both of us were like so digusted by e reporter who wrote e lines la. pls lor... I tink e reporter shld do some homework b4 going to ppl's concert. dun anyhow write lor. she dun understand wad e concert concept is abt so she commented so badly abt e concert as if e concert wasn't worth watching at all. but if u gonna ask us fans, we know wad exactly JJ trying to bring out to us lor. e only thing she commented well was JJ playing piano while singing. wth?! if JJ's going to do tt during e whole concert, it'll then b more boring la! somemore say Jinsha act cute! excuse me lor, Jinsha IS cute, she dun have act. and in any way I bet she's prettier than u 100x! pls la, next time for any concert, kindly send a more sensible reporter who'll do his/her homework & not give crap comments. stupid reporter.
anw, we took train to JP to shop la. our funny topic nv end de la! wif jiahui ard, it's always so hilarious.or shld I say coz it's e both of us. haha... jiahui showed me this puma shoes she wanted to buy, but she bought e other one her friend asked her to buy e other day. so now she considering whether she wan buy tt puma shoes not. haha... rich sia! dun encourage her to buy! haha... walk walk shop shop, end up only jiahui bought a pair of new socks. nth caught my interest la.. haha... we went to e pet shop & saw tis 2 puppies fighting. so cute la! haha... went home after tt.
when I reach home, I added Alex from J3 as my friendster friend. haha... and he accepted it in less than 15min la! *secret* it's sth jiahui told me abt friendster friends & its relationships. super funny la... *evil chuckle* our talk is endless la.. juz keep crapping wif jiahui whole day on msn la.. haha...
Thursday, July 06, 2006
I dun give a damn!
got back wsna test today.. well... a B... wad shld I say? to me, it's not tt bad.. but I dun understand y some ppl think I'm upset & disturbed when I din get an A or when someone score higher than me. I dun care who score better than me seriously. but y do ppl care abt to think tt I care? it's none of ur business rite.. for goodness sake, it's not e 1st time.. honestly, if I care so much for this kind of things, it'll b endless. surely there's going to be tt many ppl who score better than me per module. so am I going to be jealous of every single one of them?? pls la, if u think of me this way, I think u shld consider thinking all over if u're my friend..
if I get gd results, I deserve it. if I get bad results, I deserve it too, plus start reflecting & bucking up, ABT MYSELF. it's not up to u ppl to decide who I am & wad I think.
on the happier note, I realize I've been happy for who I am nowadays. for those ppl who try to hurt me in the mindset, sorry but I've to say, they failed. coz I've ppl who love me & stand by me to support me. I truly appreciate wad they've done for me now. they love me for who I am, and not trying to change me. I've been naughty & playful, but they still care for me. now u dun see tears but only laughter! thanks for everything, every little bit.. all I can say is, " yi qie jing zai bu yan zhong" hee =P
if I get gd results, I deserve it. if I get bad results, I deserve it too, plus start reflecting & bucking up, ABT MYSELF. it's not up to u ppl to decide who I am & wad I think.
on the happier note, I realize I've been happy for who I am nowadays. for those ppl who try to hurt me in the mindset, sorry but I've to say, they failed. coz I've ppl who love me & stand by me to support me. I truly appreciate wad they've done for me now. they love me for who I am, and not trying to change me. I've been naughty & playful, but they still care for me. now u dun see tears but only laughter! thanks for everything, every little bit.. all I can say is, " yi qie jing zai bu yan zhong" hee =P
Monday, July 03, 2006
Guardian Angel
watched PS... I Love you last nite... cant say it's a bad show, but it's not tt great either.. coz e story is abit here & there, so u get abit lost here & thr aso lor.. but den stil, e gist of e story is abt tis guy who kept his promise to b e girl's guardian angel, even after he die. touching yet not so touching la. haha...
anw, after watching, I requested on my msn nick tt I wan a guardian angel who'll reach out for me someday.. well... really got response sia.. 1 tt jiaqun knows, 1 tt she dunno.. e one tt jiaqun know is super thick-skin & lame la, so not counted. =.= e other one leh... sincere but li bu cong xin la.. so I shall wait for e day when my true guardian angel appears.. hehe...
*Where's My Guardian Angel?*
anw, after watching, I requested on my msn nick tt I wan a guardian angel who'll reach out for me someday.. well... really got response sia.. 1 tt jiaqun knows, 1 tt she dunno.. e one tt jiaqun know is super thick-skin & lame la, so not counted. =.= e other one leh... sincere but li bu cong xin la.. so I shall wait for e day when my true guardian angel appears.. hehe...
*Where's My Guardian Angel?*
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